Sleep and stressing myself, will the hols ever arrive!

Honeybear, I wish you would sleep my love. I know this too will pass, but sometimes I just want to sleep. I want to sleep without a 2 year old draped over me. I want to sleep on my pillow with some blankets.
I know some people might be thinking we must just leave him in his room, but we are not up for a screaming tantrum from a distressed child in the middle of the night. Sometimes, though, I want a break.
I tell hubby that sometimes I feel like a single parent (ok maybe they have it worse). Hubby works long hours so I am often the one taking care of Honeybear and doing bath-time and bed-time and singing and reading endless bedtime stories.
It does make me wonder what those single parents do. Who gives them a break? It must be tough sometimes, not having someone else there to help out and be your partner.
My sister is a sort of single parent, but she has loads of support from my parents and other two sisters, but I still think it must suck. You want someone to sit down with, amongst the sea of toys and books, when your little one is finally in bed. You want the other half to ooh and aah with you about how well your genes came together.
I must count myself lucky. Hubby comes home every night and he is there when I need him. He is the only other person Honeybear will go to without crying or making a fuss. I can leave Honeybear with hubby and have total peace of mind. That can happen with no one else.
In other news, I am looking forward to planning our holiday. We never get a family holiday during December (Hubby has to work). We are planning one now and I am all excited. I feel like Christmas has come again. We just need to work out what to do with our furry child. She is even more anti-social than Honeybear so it gets difficult getting someone else to look after her. It is almost better to leave her alone. I think we will just leave her home, with a friend to come by and make sure she has enough food and water (though that is not what I worry about). I wonder if it is hubby or I who create these anti- social children?
I was always surrounded by my friends all through school and varsity. I only began to feel lonely when I moved to Pretoria. I went through a whole long time feeling very lonely, but things have changed and I have settled in and made new friends. Not close friends like I ever had before, but friendly enough to have coffee and chat. No one I would ever share anything meaningful with, but close enough to invite around to share a meal.
Writing that makes me think I am anti-social. I like my privacy, and Hubby cannot understand why I never share anything with my Mom. I love my Mom and I know she is there for me, but I feel I should protect her. She does not need to know the deep things that bother me. I know my Mom would question some of my decisions, and I respect that so I never tell her anything. I think one of the reasons I do not share much, is I do not want to be judged or answer any questions about my choices. I share more here than I have ever shared with anyone, except Hubby. He has been the only person I have ever felt comfortable enough to share myself with.
I wonder what Honeybear will be like? Will he have a group like I did? Or be a solitary soul like hubby? I wonder if he will ever find someone he can share his secrets with? Do you wonder the kind of person your child will be and the things he will do. Will he be loved and liked? Will he be good to people and sensitive? Will he be selfish? Will he still be a sweetheart? Will he maybe be single parent one day?
Oh my word, this wondering is giving me stress, so I will stop right there!