Watching some mindless sitcom a while a go it got me thinking about porn and relationships. Not just porn, but other men and women and how it affects one’s relationship.
Scenario: Married couple walking through a busy mall. Lotsa gorgeous guys and girls walking around in all manner of skimpy outfits, plain jeans and t-shirts….etc. Hubby checks out a sexy and female and comments on her attributes to wife:
Wife’s Reaction:
- You sleazy, disrespectful piece of dirt. Have no consideration for her or me. How could you? I’m right here with you?!!!!?
- Wow, she is sexy, she has great legs. I wish I could wear a skirt like that too.
Is she being insecure or is he being a pig? Many women (and men) tend to be insecure in their relationships. This possibly stems from low self-confidence. Thinking that you are just not good enough. Yes you are in a relationship now, but if something “better” comes along then you will be the bubblegum stuck to the shoe, an annoyance and something to scrape off and throw to side.
The same applies to porn. Its dirty and filthy and how could anyone want to watch that stuff, or read it? This attitude also appears to be rooted in insecurities. Porn, (the legal kind) is usually a turn on for most people (whether you are brave enough to admit it or not). So why the outrage when she catches him? Why can it not be shared and enjoyed together?
There are men and women who are quite ready to accept it all. Even if you are married, one is free to leave at anytime. So if he is walking down the corridor holding your hand, its you, not that sexy women leaning over. Just because you are married, does not mean that one cannot appreciate good looks in another.
If you love something, let it go, if it comes back its yours, if not then it never was….does that hold any water?
Notes to Honeybear 
there is a mob meeting coming soonpls go check my blog for details and let me know if you are interested.hope to see you therethanks
It’s fine to be appreciative of others, if need be, but it’s not necessary to be disrespectful about it.My boyfriend doesn’t even notice other girls or women. It would kill me if he did, to be honest. I guess my insecurity stems from my ex always being all over other women. But luckily my boyfriend is not like that. He only has eyes for me. I like porn – I find it amusing.
I don’t think its realistic to say that someone has eyes only for one other person…..if something is attractive it just is. Just because you find someone else attractive too does not mean that you want to be with them. Charlene, I don’t know your boyfriend, but if he is human he does notice other women, he just does not tell you because he respects the fact that it would hurt you. LOL, my hubby says I’m too analytical about porn, I sit there trying to work out how.
I enjoy porn too and my husband and I enjoyed it together. Put it this way, I was six months pregnant when a group of buddies saw me coming out of a porn shop with movies!!*blush*
I totally agree
If its done in moderate then its fine. The last thing you want is your man watching so much porn that he totally disregards you.
I see men, but I don’t notice them in a ‘wow, he’s sexy’ kind of way. It’s just that I don’t have the need to, I guess. I don’t notice them. My man is everything I need. To me it’s not about looks, it’s about what goes on inside and what goes on inside Thilo is what I am attracted to. That’s why I don’t notice other men. If I was interested in what goes on inside somebody else, to me it’s as good as cheating. I am simply not interested.And the same goes for Thilo.We absolutely only have eyes for each other. Our ‘eyes’ just look deeper than the surface.
Charlene you have just said it” our eyes look deeper”. There is a difference in appreciating someone aesthetically and actually knowing the inside of someone else. If you notice someone else is good looking its just the surface. You know your partner and thats who you want. However, many people don’t realise this significant difference and hence get mad. Stardust, I will not comment on your religious beliefs. That’s personal and its not what this blog is about, I don’t want to start religiuous arguments. However, you could do with being more tolerant of other people. There are ways to put forward views without being judgemental.