Tag Archives: relationships

I love love.

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I remember the reason I started a blog, way back in the day was because of Valentines day.  I remember reading all these blogs that just hated Valentines day and said how they never celebrate it. I love Valentines day.

I know it is commercialised, but which occasion is not commercialised?  I feel it has to be what you make of it for yourself.  I love the celebration of love.  Surely you are a bit of a Scrooge not to celebrate love?  I don’t restrict myself to romantic love.  As I grew older I felt the need to remember love in all its forms and that needed to be celebrated. Our world definitely needs love.
This year HB said he had a letter for us but we could not see it until today.  He woke early, by himself to get it out and give it to us.  It is a sweet love bug card with a photo inside of him, on the first day of G1.
I cooked our Valentines dinner last night. It just needs to be reheated tonight. It is basically lasagna without the pasta.  I used aubergine instead.  Perhaps it is then eggplant parmigiana?  I subbed the flour carbs in the white sauce by using a puree of cauliflower.  I know I said I would never do these weird things, but pureed cauliflower with fried onions, garlic and nutmeg is surprisingly close to the real thing. It worked.  I have not told hubby about my white sauce, I want him to work it out for himself and it will be a good indication of its authenticity, because hubby always makes the white sauce in our house.
I was going to do cheesecake for dessert, but it did not work out.  I over whipped the cream, and then it separated. It was just not coming together and then it completely separated.  No saving that.  The low carb base tastes amazing though (sunflower seeds, dessicated coconut, dark cocoa, and butter).  I will give it a try again, with a different brand of cream. I can make fridge cheesecake in my sleep, so I am not sure what happened last night.
HB is looking forward to the dinner.  I told him will do the whole candles and flowers thing.  He has chocolate for dessert (because he refuses to eat frozen yoghurt and I don’t want him having the artificial sweetener in the cheesecake base).
HB told me he wants to marry me this morning.  I tried to explain about how I am already married to Papa, but he was having none of that.
We gave chocolates to his teachers and a little posy of frangipani to his class teacher. I am so proud of my frangipani, it is out of my very own tree.
Today I remember and appreciate the love relationships that I have in my life.  I have a full family of husband and child and parents and sisters and nephews and cousins and aunts and uncles.  I have so many people who I can turn to, who will be there if I need them to be.  I have friends I can rely on.  Today is about remembering and appreciating these relationships and giving thanks for a life filled with love.
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New year stuff

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The new year begins with optimism and all good thoughts.  I had a lovely, and extremely busy break.  Two weeks of working very hard and ensuring kids were fed, bathed and happy.  Then one week of busy sight-seeing with our little family of three.

It was nice to sight see in the city I grew up in, and show it to hubby.  This is the first time we have managed to take time off together for a whole week in Durban (bar our wedding almost ten years ago).
Honeybear loved being part of a big family.  I loved reconnecting with all of our family and this year we really made a big effort on the family gatherings.
Hubby and I spent time together, really spent time together.  We did not really do a date like we planned, only because we did not know what to do with ourselves without HB, which is a little silly. We will work more on that one.
I loved having my nephews around and spending time with them.  I loved doing crafty things with the kids and making them weird lunches their moms don’t make. Haha, I think I loved being the favourite aunt all holiday.
This holiday I made lists of things to do, to get the maximum done, family activities done, crafts with the kids, and I forgot about rest time…which means my holiday was way busier than work time.
But it is back to work this week and things are already busy and I find myself only having ticked of one thing of my list from yesterday (it is a long list, and this is my pattern…and then I get going).
Our brains are weird like that.  I will make my list and start on it…to find something I can’t work out, like some retaining wall levels or something like that.  I will abandon it and continue to something else, but my lovely brain continues to work it out in the background, and then I suddenly get it.  Our brains are so amazingly made, that we can do such things. it is one of those things they tell you at school….if you cannot work it out, move onto the next problem, instead of wasting time.
I have no big new year’s resolutions, goals, plans…I just want to be happy and good. I want to be better at being me, which is not something I can just do in one sitting, it is going to take time, and I plan on being gentle and kind to myself.
This year I have also taken to planning HB too…he has a full schedule, I don’t want hm rushing from one thing to the other.  His quiet time and fun needs to be planned in, so we do not forget it.
We received a report from the school ed. psych. yesterday…if it was not email, I would have chucked it in the bin. I am not doing that to him again this year.  He has proven that he can do what needs to be done, just leave him to it.
Hubby is on a weightloss journey.  I am helping him…to try to get him to stick with it, instead of adhoc. It will help me eat better too (though I have given up this weight thing…I am going to be happy with me.  I refuse to be hungry.)

The last one for 2017.

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This is going to be the last post of the year.  We are off for three weeks on Friday.  IO am so looking forward to it.

This year has been an emotional rollercoaster and a year when I learned a few things:

  1. I am a good mother.  No headmistress, psychologist or teacher will ever again make me think I am any less than a good mother.  All a child needs is love.
  2. I am a good teacher.  I can find the way to make someone understand something.
  3. I am a not so good wife.  I have taken my husband for granted.  He is not just a supporting role in my story, he is my story.  This break is for reconnecting and reminding us both that I need to be nicer to him. He is my love.
  4. Changing jobs was one of the best things I have ever done this year.  I feel so much better.
  5. I am all about justice and doing the right thing…I need to remember that deciding what that is, is not my sole responsibility or right.
  6. I can do more than I think can and believing goes a long way to getting things done.
  7. I am a generally good person, but sometimes I am not….those sometimes need to be worked upon.
  8. I have lived away from my parents house for eleven years, but I still miss them terribly.
  9. Kindness is the best way to carry yourself.

Thank you ladies for all the support and kind words.

Dates and other stuff.

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Hubby and I had our meeting with the educational psychologist this morning.  The relief I feel is so good.  She said to us that she has not spoken to the teacher as she prefers to work without preconceived notions. (I feel better).  She asked us questions about Honeybear and the type of child that he is and all the little things to get to know our little boy from our point of view.

Then she went on to tell us how she would go about her assessment.
The first thing was to meet with us, then Honeybear and also to specifically observe him in class and with his friends.  Also, it would take a few weeks because she had to get to know our child and understand the person he is (big sigh of relief). She also mentioned that sometimes these problems are nothing more than a personality clash between teacher and child ( I am so glad she mentioned that)
After this meeting I feel like I should have sessions with her, as she is so calming and seems to understand the worries and anxieties I feel as a parent.
She asked that we prepare Honeybear for meeting with her next week, and the one thing we might have to do is a bloodtest to rule out physical issues that may be impacting on his classwork.  She did say it would be something that may come, not sure at this stage, and she would help prepare him, should the need arise.  Having them draw blood is not going to be easy for me.
Anyway, I feel better about this whole thing and let us see what happens.
Tomorrow we have the soccer morning and I do not look forward to it.  It is such a long morning for all of us and by the second match we all want to go home and the kids do not want to play the third match.  It is being hosted by another school and they really do not serve nice coffee in proper glass/ porcelain mugs/cups. I know it sounds silly, but you need the coffee to get you through the morning.  It starts early and I just cannot drink out that white polystyrene cup.  I must remember to take my own coffee.
Our school sets up coffee tables with cookies and cups and saucers and mugs and water with lemon and  ice.  Tea and coffee and choices about the type you want.  I guess we are a little spoiled at out school.  It is soccer after all, not a coffee bar.
Honeybear and I are on our own, as Hubby is working this weekend.  I do not mind the time on our own, as it is mothers day and we can do our own dates for the weekend. I am thinking, movie picnic this evening, and then after soccer we may both need a nap.  I am going to make pancakes for Sunday breakfast ( I have a pancake monster on the weekends).  And perhaps a proper outdoor picnic for Sunday afternoon.
Hubby and I have instituted date nights.  Proper ones (it is home or Spur, but at his stage babysitting is just too expensive to on a regular basis).  We wait for Honeybear to go to sleep and then we can watch a grownup movie.  The advantage of the home/Spur date is that we the first part of the evening is a whole family date.
Consciously spending time together is good for all relationships.

Random bits and pieces.

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I looked up now, it is one of those lazy Friday afternoons.  Everyone is sitting plugged into their PC via earphones.  Lost in their pre-weekend world.  Doing little tasks and waiting for the bell to ring.
Hubby and I had a fight last night.  We made up before bedtime, but it is not nice to fight with your husband.
I am seeing Honeybear’s speech therapist next week.  I need a proper chat with her as to where we are going with this.
There is a kiddies birthday party coming up and I realise I need a gift budget.
We are having a Ninja Turtle birthday party for Honeybear. I am looking forward to it, as this is an easy one to plan.  I will start buying the bits and pieces early and invite my parents too.
I want to go visit my parents next week, hopefully I can swing the long weekend.
Our wedding anniversary approaches in a few days…9 years (we are old!)
I am looking forward to my sister visiting next week.
What will I cook?  Something traditional or something new (for my sister’s family).
I love the menu planning and freezer meals we did.  We are almost at the need of April and we still have meals to eat. (2 months).
I like having time to myself.  A lot of time.  I like to be by myself.
Honeybear and I had a Mom and son date day about 2 weeks ago.  Completely unplanned, but one of those days that will stick in my mind.  He loved it too and I love that we can appreciate things together like that.
Had dinner with friends this week.  It was so great to see everyone and to catch up (we all used to work together at some point but have moved or not moved).
I am planning on a family weekend.  Time to be us together.
I am upset with my Dad, but I need to let it go.  He is older, living in a different time from me and does not always understand me.
I am worried about my youngest sister.  I wish I could make things better for her.
I have turned into a good cook.
Perhaps I need to invite my cousin over this weekend.  She is a good person.
I need to adopt a child.  It is the thing in me, which comes back over and over.
Does hubby want to adopt…No.  *sigh*