Work is crazy and we have been asked to “put in the extra effort.” I am not sure how much more effort I have in me. I cannot work after I leave the office. I have a whole other life happening outside the office. The office does not like my other life infringing on office time, and that works both ways. The office has to respect the fact that my family deserves their time.
Is it different for men and women? Hubby is not going through this struggle at all. He does not understand. He knows that something is making me unhappy, and keeps coming home with chocolates, etc. to make me feel better.
To be very honest, I feel like hubby has not had to make any changes at all to his working or life. I have had to negotiate my work hours in order to leave the office and get to the school. Hubby just does the same work hours. Hubby needs to work a Saturday, he just works a Saturday. He needs to go in on Sunday morning, he just does it. I agonize about taking time away from our family. I agonize about all the work that I have not done and just cannot do.
Then I end up getting snappy with a work colleague trying to micromanage me. It did not go well, and he is tiptoeing around me…which is not right.
I feel on edge all the time. Will I get there on time. Is there something else I can do? I just cannot find the answer.
In about three weeks there is half term holidays. It is a Monday and a Friday but who is supposed to be available for Honeybear. The holiday care starts at eight and closes at four. There is no way those hours are workable in my life. No way. It is an hour too early both ways.
I have been pulling my hair out trying to find alternative solutions, but I can find nothing. Nothing. I can see nothing. I get more and more stressed as the time approaches.
Yesterday I get told that work programmed for me, 30 days worth of documentation, needs to be done by Monday. And I had already planned another project over the weekend. It just cannot be done, no way. I am upset that they know exactly how much needs to be done, how many resources available, but just close their eyes and hope for the best. The them is the directors. I know they are under pressure, but just telling people to do stuff does not work. We sit down and programme everyone at the beginning of every week. They are programmed with too much to do already, and then halfway through the week, it is thrown out the window. I just do not need this stress in my life.
I am careful about making sure everything works in my life, and that I meet deadlines, but I know it is impossible to do this. Even if I did not sleep for the next few days, there is no way it is going to happen.
I am going to just drop that ball and then deal with it afterwards. It cannot happen. It cannot work.
While I write this, I get another project, which needs to be done this afternoon. Does not matter I need to go fetch my child from school.
It is just plain disrespect for the people we are.