My sad baby


I had notes from the school saying Honeybear has not been himself the last two days. Just that. When I spoke to the teacher’s assistant she said he does not eat and is just not himself. As soon as we got home, he ate a snack and then dinner and he played and looked fine to me. I saw his teacher this morning and she said he is not himself. I asked what is wrong because he has been eating at home. She says he is sad. She says there seems to be a sadness in him and he will not eat and does not want to play.

She asked, in a very roundabout way, if Hubby and I have broken up. I think she thought he might be sad over that. Also, hubby had dropped Honeybear at day-care the last two mornings which is unusual.

I was a little taken aback, and now I am worried. What is my little baby sad about? Obviously something is wrong.

Hubby has been working late shift all week so Honeybear will not really see him until tomorrow afternoon and then again on Monday afternoon. When I tried to explain the effect of Hubby working the late shift all week, to him, he was upset with me and just assumed I was making a huge deal over nothing. Now maybe I was not so melodramatic?

Honeybear runs into the house calling for his Papa and looking for him. He asks all afternoon where his Papa is. Hubby has no idea the effect of these hours on our family. I have tried to explain, however, we end up in fight usually, so I try not to say anything. It is not just Mom’s that have guilt , I am very sure Hubby feels it too, I just wish he would understand that there are things in life far more important than work.


12 responses »

  1. That will really bug me as well if I get a note like that from the school. Has something changed at school, new child in his class, new classroom assistant, new food?

    I’m at a loss about what you should do.

    Good luck!

  2. Aw man, that’s so sad. But it’s great that the school has picked up on HB’s sadness. Liam is also extremely chuffed if both DH and I drop him off and pick him up, but he is totally out of his element if DH do things on their own. For the last 2 morning’s I’ve been told I’m not allowed to drive with them “mom, you have to go in Daisy (the car), she has enough petrol and I want to go alone with Dad”
    It may well be that HB is missing his Daddy terribly. Boys have a special bond with their Dads, I see it with DH and Liam. And HB is such a sensitive little soul, bless him
    Good luck, I hope he cheers up soon

  3. Oh dear. Also can’t think of any advice. Late shifts suck, sorry about the situation with your hubby. 😦
    I think if it were me, I’d just up the TLC time for Honeybear, make sure he’s feeling the love.
    Good luck!

  4. Oh poor little HB! Maybe he’s just really missing his dad … the late shift really sucks! Sorry about that 😦
    Maybe hubby and HB can spend some one-on-one time whenever hubby has a chance?
    Sorry … I do hope HB feels better soon.

  5. Next time when Honeybear is running around calling and looking for his daddy, make a video of it on your cellphone. I did it once to show my hubby when he was away on business as he would not believe it either. These little ones’ hearts or so soft, they easily miss a parent when not around. Big hugs, hope Honeybear will be his cheerful self again soon.

  6. Thank you Debs. I just do not want Hubby to feel “Papa guilt” I know he feels badly about the hours but there was one bad decision that messed up the week. We will try to be better next week.

  7. Shame changes like shifts are difficult for them to understand…when BB started working LO tries to stay awake when she worked the late shift so she could say good night….now we send her a voice message at bedtime and she take selfies she sends to BB at work.
    Good luck

    • We did the messages and voice notes for a while, but this is the reality of our lives so we need to come to some long term solution. We are working towards it slowly. Hubby’s promotions happened too fast, and as good as it was for him, it has left out family a little at sea.

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