I have been reading these articles on Parent24 about home birthing.  It sounds absolutely beautiful.  I must say, most of those articles also seem to be written from the standpoint that there must be something wrong with women who choose a hospital environment to birth a baby.  I am sure it is not the intention, and a lot must be my perception.
I would choose the birth experience I had again, because Honybear and I came through it safe and healthy and hubby also shared the experience.  Maybe I might change that part, where hubby shares it, because I know he is still traumatised by the experience. 
I never believed fathers needed to be part of the birth experience, and I more strongly believe so after the birth of Honeybear.  A woman in labour needs other women around her.  Women who are experienced and calm and can help her to understand the things that are happening.  Women the mother can have confidence in.  I know all men are not like hubby.  Hubby would do it all over again, because of the pressures of society for men to be involved in childbirth, not because he thinks he can offer any valuable support to me.  Hubby was crying and vomiting through our birth experience, and I can tell you, that was no help to me.  The calm voices of the midwife and my doctor was helpful.  Sitting with the arms of the labour sister around me was more helpful, and I was at my calmest when hubby was out of the room.
A homebirth would never have worked for me, there would have been no way it I was relaxed.  I needed a hospital birth anyway, because I ended up with an emergency caesarean section.  After 12 hours of drug free natural labour and an umbilical cord wrapped around Honeybear, it was the best option.  He turned out fine, I was fine, hubby not so much.  He was also relieved by the C-section, because he could hide under the screen next to me, until the baby was handed to us, clean and wrapped in a towel.  We did not suffer issues with breastfeeding that is always the arguments against medical interventions.  I held my baby the whole time I was in the theatre.  I held him as they wheeled me to the ward and we breastfed without issues. 
Like breastfeeding or formula, or any of the choices we make for ourselves and our families, we do what we need to do.  We do what is right for us, and who cares about what anyone else has to say.


2 responses »

  1. Shame, poor hubby. I originally elected for a CS but ended up having natural birth because Liam was 3 weeks early and came to quickly once labour started. But DH stepped out for a breather and when he came back into the ward he caught the sight of Liam’s little head popping out. Hehe, he doesn’t talk about it much but I think the mental image is engraved in his mind forever. I think it’s because they don’t like seeing their lovely wives in pain, that’s all. That’s why they feel a bit queasy. I must admit I’m the same. I’ve seen my mum have various painful operations and I always feel like I have to vomit and get out of there NOW

  2. I don’t think I’ll be able to do it at home either, but I must say, Stan is my rock, he was with me through two births, and he never got sick, never passed out, never showed the panic I’m sure he must have experienced, but like you say, not all men are the same… Lol.

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