So this weekend I decided to do a little seduction. (We have had a seven day drought brought on by missing pills and the fact that I have been struck down by germs, sneezing really kills the sexy bug). So I call hubby and tell him that I am going to kidnap him from work. And on we go with the flirty smses and calls, until I realise I actually do not have it in me to drive all the way to his work and kidnap. So we agree that I will kidnap him at the front door and have my wicked way. So here I am planning the kidnap. But I still have to do the normal stuff. So on with cooking. Butternut soup. Only to find that the butternut has now stained my hands orange. OK, hubby probably will not care about my orange hands, but I am now feeling a bit less sexy here. As the time approaches I realise the bed linen is still on the wash line, with the bed airing. So I rush out and grab them off the line.
Then MIL calls. So I sit there having a chat, all the time thinking I have to save my legs and shower and dry my hair and I have one hour left. This is now getting close, I am now feeling even less sexy. So quickly shave (thank god for modern technology), jump in the shower. What to wear. Start digging up boots that I know Hubby loves. Pull them on, tie on skirt. Then I realise skirt must be ironed. This seduction is getting out of hand. SO I iron the thing. Tie it back on. Now I don’t have the appropriate shirt. What to do? By now I am hot and starting to sweat, very unsexy. Dressed, realise the bed still has no bed linen. So there I am topless in a skirt and boots dressing the bed. Get the stuff on, and realise I still don’t have a shirt. OK. Grab a scarf and “artfully” drape the thing over myself, I hear hubby’s car. Oops, my hair. Quickly grab a clip and pull it into a knot. Send a quick sms to Hubby to tell him to come in and close the front door. I am now feeling decidedly unsexy.
Hubby walks in and starts putting down his stuff. I sashay into the lounge in my ensemble. He pulls me toward him and kisses me, and in that moment I realise I could have just worn my tatty jeans and t-shirt. It would have been just the same.
Talking afterwards, he said to me that the idea of the kidnap was enough to get him going. The rest was by the way. So much for my seduction. It all turned out really well, but there was no need.